I’m genuinely in the place of my life that I just want happiness for myself. Over the past 3 years it’s been such a hard roller coasters for me and I just want more for myself. Every year I see people want to change— “New Year, new me.” Does that actually help? What exactly are people hoping for over the next 365 days? I ended the year how I started it. I want to be proactive this year 2019 but, I expect to revert to my old routines when my body needs the rest after a painful day.
I hate disappointing myself when I know I have the strength in me to do better. I need to have that drive in me that I used to—confidence something that dwindled away. I’m not setting expectations for them to not be met anymore. My goals are to slowly work my way back to where I was... that’s what I’ve been trying to do. I motivate myself to get stronger and then I force it. It’s become this painful routine that sets me up to fail. I realize if I want to accomplish those goals, I need to go back to the basics.
Finish school by my birthday.
Gain my confidence back.
Be a better blogger.
Leave my bed.
I’m done watching life pass me by and I know change has to start with me. Believe me I’m working on it. I’m ready for this year and all the blessings that will come with it.